We Are Completely Useless

This party will do absolutely nothing. We promise to accomplish zero of our goals and disappoint everyone equally.

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Waste Your Vote

Why We'll Fail

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Zero Experience

None of our candidates have any idea what they're doing. We're not even sure how government works, but we're pretty sure it's broken.

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Maximum Procrastination

Why solve problems today when you can ignore them forever? We'll form committees to discuss forming other committees.

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Guaranteed Disappointment

We promise to let you down in ways you never imagined. Our platform is literally just giving up and going home.

🗳️ Pointless Popularity Contest

Vote for your favorite politician! We don't care about your useless vote and we won't save it. This poll is as meaningless as our entire platform.

Candidate 1

Elon

Promises to do nothing

0 wasted votes
Candidate 2

Trump

Currently in office doing presidential things (we think)

0 wasted votes
Candidate 3

Biden

Still Alive?

0 wasted votes
Candidate 4

Obama

Promises to do even less

0 wasted votes

Remember: Your vote is completely meaningless and we're not storing it anywhere. This poll resets every time you refresh the page because we're too lazy to build a proper database.

📋 Useless Proposals

Swipe through our completely pointless policy proposals! We don't care what you think, we don't listen to feedback, and your vote is useless. But hey, at least it's fun to swipe!

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Total Ignored

🎉 Congratulations!

You've swiped through all our useless proposals. We've carefully noted your preferences and will proceed to ignore them completely.

Remember: Your swipes are meaningless and we're not storing them anywhere. These proposals will never be implemented because we're too lazy to govern. This is just digital busy work.

🏢 Campaign Office VR Tour

Controls: Click and drag to look around the office

🎧 The Listening Ear

Fed up with politics? Tired of politicians who actually pretend to care? Welcome to our safe space where your political frustrations go to die. We won't listen, we won't act, and we definitely won't remember what you said.

Disclaimer: Your vent will be posted below for others to ignore. We promise to do absolutely nothing with your feedback. This is not therapy, this is just organized complaining.

Recent Vents (That We're Ignoring)

Disillusioned Voter 2 hours ago Everything
"I'm so tired of voting for the 'lesser of two evils.' Can't we just have ONE politician who isn't completely terrible? At least you guys are honest about being useless."
Taxpayer McTaxface 4 hours ago Taxes & Spending
"They keep raising taxes and then spend the money on the dumbest things. At least if you guys were in charge, you'd just lose the money instead of wasting it on purpose."
Anonymous Citizen #31415 1 day ago Politicians
"Politicians say they'll 'fight for us' but then they just fight with each other on Twitter. Your party's honesty about doing nothing is refreshing."
Frustrated Parent 2 days ago Existential Political Dread
"I used to think my vote mattered. Now I realize it's all just performance art. At least your party admits it's all meaningless."